Aubameyang and Ozil talk Turkey – It’s enlightening!

Auba & Ozil Talk Turkey

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With the restrictions now lifted and the summer finally arriving in England, Auba & Ozil decide to have a catch over a swift half in the local.


Auba: “Mesut, how goes things? Long-time no see.”

Ozil: “Yeah, all good”



Raspberry Ripple Photo shoot

Auba: “What have you been doing for the past 6 months man? Haven’t seen you since the raspberry ripple photo shoot “

Ozil: “Well, you know, a bit of Fortnight, a bit of foot…, oh actually, a lot of Fortnight and no football”


Auba: “Dude, what’s with that no football, what have you done upset Mickey, he’s a cool dude”

Ozil: “Err, I don’t know. Apparently, according the boss, I have the same ‘opportunities’ as everyone else. I mean, I earn £350k a week, double everyone else, I should be the first name on the list, no? It’s not like I was bragging about my wages like Douzi, was it”



Auba: “No, not bragging !?!?!?”

Ozil: “I mean, yeah, I didn’t take the pay cut like everyone else, but it’s hard work earning £350k a week, you know?”

Auba: “No”

Ozil: “I mean, babies are expensive, right? Anyway, I’m fine, if he doesn’t want to play me, that’s cool, I ain’t going anywhere. I’ll sit at home for the next 12 months; it beats a cold Wednesday night in Stoke any day of the week”

Auba: “Blimey, you really haven’t given a monkeys for a long time, we haven’t played Stoke in like 3 years.”

Ozil: “Must have missed that”

Auba: “Like most things recently. But man, don’t you miss, the camaraderie, the buzz, the thrill of it all?”

Ozil: “Nah, I’m cool, £1.5m a month, daily Fortnight tournaments, Kola pops round for a sparring session when Mickey drops him too and I get to pop back to Turkey to see the folks whenever I want”

Auba: “Oh yeah, on that, Hector asked, next time you go back, can you get him a cheap carton of Marlboro for him “



Auba’s phone rings.

Auba: “Sorry, Mez, gotta run, getting my FA Cup winners medal polished and a new mega contract to sign. At least I’ll earn mine”


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