A slight change to WHAT IF…‏ Wenger always knew But…… Sh.t happened!!

Arsene Wenger and Fans (including our own writer?? 🙂

Been hectic times for me, so haven’t had the opportunity to chat with all you lovely, happy/moany/angry Arsenal fans. I started a piece at the beginning of December, and, funnily enough, the topic still stands today. Even though, I feel had I sent it our at the start of December I would have received my puppy’s tail sent in the post. Demanding for me to stop talking shite, or the pup gets it…

You see, I was trying to make sense of all the madness that was going on, the bad results, throwing away of leads, lack of the famous DM. Mostly, trying to make sense of the crap some people had been spouting when clearly there had been obvious reasons for a lot of the problems…… “NO!!! NOT WENGER!!!”, Before you shout it… Some of the shite I’ve seen spoken/tweeted over the last two months has been nothing short of an embarrassing, sickening at times, if I’m honest..

At the time, I’d titled it “WHAT IF?”. It was something along the lines of this.

On this DM thing, everyone’s bewilderment at the lack of signing a DM or a Centre back, at the time I asked myself, WHAT IF Sagna had stayed. Debuchy or Debuchy’s £10m might not have needed to be spent on that position, as Wenger seemed to know (even though the experts didn’t) that Bellerin would step up this year. For this reason leaving that £10m to be spent elsewhere in the side, probably the extra amount that would’ve been required for Schneiderlin. (Yes he has to work to a budget before you start saying “blow De f…kin lot Venga ye coont”).

WHAT IF he had bought Chambers with the idea that he would have plenty of time to work with him, to train him up to the CB role and that famous poxy DM position, before throwing him into the first team, not knowing that an injury list similar to an episode of M.A.S.H. Was about to occur.

WHAT IF he didn’t want Koscielny, Gibbs, Debuchy all to get injured at precisely the same time, for this reason throwing all plans out the window…

WHAT IF Wenger, unlike the experts, had also known and been watching Coquelin, knowing that he’d be taking him back at some point in this season. WHAT IF he also didn’t want Arteta getting a lovely long injury too…

Now I know Arteta isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but WHAT IF he’s exactly the type of player suitable for the role. Ala Kroos and Alonso (ok not as good as them, but you get my drift)..

“Why didn’t he buy enough players to cover all these options?”, The unhappy roar… Well, WHAT IF he didn’t want to do a Tottenham, or do a (this year) Liverpool, and sign 6,7 or 8 players all in one window and try to integrate them at once. It seems we’re all quick to point and laugh when someone else makes that mistake, but yet, still demand that Wenger does exactly the same fuck up..


WHAT IF he always planned to buy 3 or 4 in summer and then an extra 2 in January, so that the integration would be smoother, and without all the injuries, it would’ve worked perfectly… Of course, there will be those who will say it’s been player power, or their fan group pressure that has caused him to change now in January…

Or those who scream and roar and ball that he should just spend, spend, spend, the whole budget, and beyond..

WHAT IF we are lucky to have a manager who cares for the longevity of the club, and not feel the need to quash the urge for immediate success.

WHAT IF he actually worries more about the club than he does about his ego… Like the pointing and laughing at spuds/pool over buying, why can we laugh at Fergie and utd for buying aging players, on huge wages, to guarantee a quick fix success for himself before bowing out, and then leaving their club to deal with the shite afterwards… We then, feel the urge to abuse Wenger for doing the opposite.

WHAT IF, after 18-19 years engrained in our club, 24/7, he might care even more than some of us. For to me, the man who quietly cares for something over the long-term, is a much greater man than the noisy spoilt cunt who knows everything and wants it all NOW!!!!.

WHAT IF it were the players who didn’t follow orders accurately, not the “Wenger doesn’t do tactics” bullshit being spouted. Just because it worked versus City, they use it as proof. How come then it’s not the first time we’ve tried the 4-1-4-1 system, but those times it didn’t work… Wenger’s fault?? Course it is… Easy target.. Not the fact that Ramsey wanted to push on for goals to end his drought. The fact that Flamini wasn’t sitting doing his job properly, or the fact that Szczesny is looking more and more like an extra from “One flew over the cuckoo’s nest” every day..

WHAT IF it is easier to win games when all your players are available, rather than trying to win with square pegs in round holes or bloody triangular ones at some point…

WHAT IF Wenger hasn’t lost his touch in the transfer market. Ok, maybe he hasn’t bought as many players as you would have liked, or as many expensive players as you would have liked, (that suits more people it seems), but by god, what he has bought, has been pretty tasty.. Ospina looks good; Chambers has a dangerous future, not to mention Alexis.. All the praise goes to Alexis, none to Arsene… So WHAT IF we actually praised him for getting the signing over the line, stop using this “he wanted to come to London”, excuse, sure isn’t Chelsea in London, and give the man a bit of credit, that I feel he more than deserves..(got it over the line while playing beach volley with a few girls, which deserves even more credit IMO)

WHAT IF he’d signed your poxy DM instead of Alexis, do you honestly think we’d be in a better position now??? I certainly don’t…

WHAT IF Wenger knows what he’s doing? Knows more than us, knows more than the egotistical blogger or fan group looking for attention. WHAT IF he’s the best man for the job, after all…?

WHAT IF you read this is expecting to see one of my jolly and funny pieces that I normally do, well I’m sorry, they’ll be back. It’s just that over the last two months, the shite I’ve seen, heard, read over, has really angered me. If all the moany’s can have their pedestal and have their fun over that time, and then I think I deserve my moment in the sun…

WHAT IF Owen Coyle was in charge like sone wanted…

That’s my lot, I know WHAT IF can also work in other ways, depending on who asks the question, but these are my WHAT IF’s and mine only…

One more thing. WHAT IF people stopped saying “Wenger can’t do defence, he’s inherited the only real defence he’s ever had.” the world would be a better place..
He inherited none of the invincibles back line. Lauren, kolo, sol, etc…..
So can we all pundits and fans alike please stop with this bullshit, or you’ll get Kaned.

Kaned – a punishment named after Harry Kane in where your head gets pumped up with the foot pedal of an inflatable mattress and then you’re forced to keep your bottom lip strapped down with an elastic band for a week…

Til the future…

I Love Arsene Wenger

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One Response to A slight change to WHAT IF…‏ Wenger always knew But…… Sh.t happened!!

  1. double canister February 6, 2015 at 3:53 pm #

    Outstanding piece of writing, Woody.

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